Getting ahead of the curve and making a difference!

I’m a very firm believer in the power of humanity becoming the change we want to see in our world. The more I’ve worked with people from different backgrounds, genders, races or religions. The more I’ve come to see that one of the biggest reasons we are not moving the needle forward for more significant gender equity is our actions and reactions on a day-to-day basis.

I’m talking about our unconcious actions and reactions!

How we respond to events and things in our lives.

How we judge ourselves and others by our assumptions made from our past experiences. Assumptions that create the box that we either place ourselves into (I’m not good enough, perfect enough, educated enough, pretty enough, intelligent enough etc.) or the box we place another person into (he/she/it are not like me; therefore I’m sceptical)

The program that is constantly running our lives on autopilot. We are used to this program; most of humanity doesn’t even pay attention to it. And when the issue and the consequences arise, we often point out and blame the culture for it.

When we blame the culture for the situation we are not happy with, it’s as if it becomes too big for us to handle, and we crawl back into our tight, airless boxes and sit there waiting for somebody else to do something for us!

Call me crazy - Call me nuts - or just call me Rúna! (joke) -

There is a way to expand the culture boxes and create new space. A space where we can get some fresh oxygen, ideas, insights and deeper awareness of what sort of a culture we want our community, organisation, country, the world to be as? Hence it’s NOT about asking the government to create new laws or regulations!

Out-Of-The-Box Conversations - a safe space to talk about the things we never talk about!

During my stay in Malta in November 2022, Mariella Camilleri, the president of BPW (Business Professional Women) Valletta, Malta and her board invited me to share my thoughts around gender equity in a set-up I called Out-Of-The-Box Conversation with Rúna Magnús.

I love facilitating these out-of-the-box conversations. Something magical happens when people get a safe space to discuss what they might never have addressed before, meaning their unconscious programs.

Feeling uneasy when our unconscious programs are being challenged!

Every time I facilitate these Out-Of-The-Box Conversations, I can see how people struggle internally as their programs, belief systems, habits and rituals are being challenged. At the same time, they are processing new perspectives of what could be possible.

During the hourlong session with over 20 business and professional women in Malta, we discussed some stereotypical gender roles.

- We discussed why women are still accepting the role of taking responsibility for children.

- Why do we expect women to take care of children? Even women who don’t even like children very much! Why do we expect women to love children? Why do we need to judge women who openly say they don’t want children or are not keen on being with them?

Why do we accept stereotypical gender roles, even if it makes us miserable? Why do we take that role quietly even if it makes us irritated and not valued for our education and/or role in the business world?

Our unconscious programs, created by our society, are taking away our rights to be who we were born to be!

We also discussed how too many women are unconsciously taking the role and responsibility not only for their children but also for other children’s children, such as their grandchildren.

We discussed how the social construct is still, in 2022, despite all the education, free childcare!* [*in Malta, there is free childcare for mothers who work outside their home - which is another topic by itself as to why it is seen as FREE for mothers!? Are women in Malta Virgin Maries, and had the children with Lord himself or?] Can you see the socially constructed box here?

Being bold enough to challenge our unconscious programs!

We didn’t have time to take the conversation a little deeper and examine the consequences of women quietly taking on this unwritten, socially constructed role. How our unconscious behaviours are not giving fathers and grandfathers, uncles and other men space to explore who they want to become as males, and how so many men are not sure of their roles in society today.

Exploring the Socially Constructed Gender Box for Men!

Men also face the consequences of the socially constructed gender box. The unwritten gender roles that have been placed on them in the past. Preventing men from discovering for themselves who they want to be. In this case, what sort of fathers, husbands and partners do they want to be? How do they want to share the gift they were born with?

There is a significant need for that Out-Of-The-Box conversation!

To give people, regardless of their genders, the time and space to explore more who they want to be? How they can share their Gods given gifts within their communities, organisations, countries or even the world.
Invite your organisation, team or network for an Out-Of-The-Box Conversation!

If you are in charge of an organisation, a network, or a business. This could be your opportunity to move the needle forward for more significant gender equity globally. It all starts with the Out-Of-The-Box Conversation, such as the one the BPW Valletta, Malta group had that evening.

It’s time for thought-provoking discussions!

Giving your people the opportunity to explore, expand and even escape some of their limiting beliefs, the boxes they’ve put themselves into, will create the internal shift that moves the needle for gender equality further.

Imagine what ripple effect that one conversation could create in your world.

Moving the needle forward for more significant gender equity worldwide means we need new types of conversations. Giving your team a safe space to dive into their assumptions and expand the boxes holding them back is one of the most effective ways to change the internal culture.

A culture where people feel safe to share their unique gifts.